Hi fellow blogees,
This shall be a short factual post. Since there is no "right" way to convey the last 1 1/2 yrs of me staying away from writing here, I'll just plunge headfirst into the friendly blog waters. Some of you noticed that I was diagnosed with epilepsy in the spring of 2010. At that time, I hoped that medication would regulate it and that would be the end of the traumatic ambulance ride and subsequent hospital week stay in the mental ward from hell. (Yes, that's a book to be written because they should have put me in the MEDICAL ward...) BTW, seizures are not merely "jerking around" and that's it. Please check out the link BELOW IN MY UPDATE TO THIS POST.
After repeated EEGs and MRIs, and a myriad of other tests and followups, my drs and I had also hoped that seizure was a one-time occurence that meant I would not need meds the rest of my life, nor have my driving priveledges continually suspended by state law for 6 months to a year's time following each subsequent seizure.
GUESS AGAIN.
Then, they did not know what caused it, just ruled out some of what did NOT cause it. They still do not know what causes them for me.
As of this writing, I have lost count of how many emergency ambulance rides. I do know how many hospital stays, when, and how long, but I am NOT SUPPOSED TO THINK SO MUCH, so no details here about that. About a month ago, I suffered the WORST seizure of may life. This time, each of my kids came to visit as soon as they could, but they could not visit me in the hospital and that is the best. I would not have gotten somewhat better there worrying about them. I have a feeling GEM told them not to come.
However, each of them came so soon after, yet they do not know how serious it really was, because they saw Mom acting pretty much near normal. Neither one has asked what happened and each one is going through job changes so I am not going to volunteer info that they can't take right now.
Unlike the other seizures, I did not get an "aura", which is VERY helpful to preventing more danger. My normally cool, calm, and collected hubster GEM, told me weeks after this last scary incident that he thought I was having a stroke, especially since the paramedics could not completely rouse me.
He STILL kept his cool to handle the ER response and so much more, without any family help since we have no family, other than our children, who give a damn. He (and me) are the type of people who handle "stuff" ourselves rather than call friends, but I WISH HE HAD CALLED FRIENDS. It was TOO MUCH on him. I remember the look on his face, right before I went into a seizure and he looked scared. The other times I've had seizures or he's found me on the floor unconcious, he's looked VERY CONCERNED when he roused me, but not AS CONCERNED AS THIS TIME... and even when he recounted what happened recently and asking me what I remembered.
So, I'm only working a day or two/wk and part time at that. I've been "recylcing art" that I already had completed before this last seizure, by entereing those into shows. I have not been exercising like I usually do, which is 45 min of cardio plus an hr more on resistance training (most thing of it as a weight machine.) I do the exercise for my health not to lose weight. I have been able to walk around and thank goodness GEM has driven me out of the house because I have gone claustrophobic from not being able to drive.
Where we live is not a "walk to many places" area, but it still is pretty for photography or hikes, but I am not supposed to hike! I'll be able to, in good time, but I sure am impatient. This nightowl is going to bed so much earlier, the moon is perplexed. *wink*
I haven't climbed the walls yet, but I have thought about it! GEM does take me to clients who can't come here and to a book club I belong to. He's the bestest (yes I know that is not a word, but I like the sound of it) hubster there is. Yep, we're still in love after all these years. I'll be performing poetry readings in about a month. You can be assured there will be at least one love poem. I'm a romantic and passionate woman.
Hope you guys have fared better than me. XXOO - EVERYONE: I AM SO SORRY I BECAME CAUGHT UP IN TELLING WHAT HAPPENED AND FORGOT TO ADD MY USUAL OPTIMISTIC OUTLOOK, WHICH IS ALSO FACTUAL. I WILL BE JUST FINE!!! I NEGLECTED TO ADD THIS CAPITALIZED PARAGRAPH INFO IN MY ORIGINAL POST HERE: WHAT I DESCRIBED HERE IS NOT LIKELY TO BE LIFE-THREATENING. (YES, I MAY FALL DOWN OR HIT MY HEAD BUT EVEN IF I HAVE A SEIZURE W/ NO ONE AROUND, I WOULD FALL ASLEEP AND WAKE UP, PERHAPS NOT KNOWING I HAD ONE. THE DRS. FEEL IT *IS* LIKELY THAT I HAVE HAD SEIZURES BEFORE 2010, BUT THEY WERE UNDOCUMENTED. (HUBBY AT WORK AND/OR OUR KIDS IN SCHOOL.)
MINE HAVE BEEN CONTROLLED FOR UP TO 18 MONTHS AT A TIME, EVEN THOUGH I WAS ALLERGIC TO SEVERAL OF THE MEDICATIONS PRESCRIBED.
AGAIN, I AM SORRY I WORRIED YOU GUYS. WHEN I WROTE THIS I ERRONEOUSLY ASSUMED THAT YOU ALL KNEW WHAT EPILESPY IS AND I FORGOT TO INCLUDE THIS LINK: What is Epilespy?
THANK YOU TO EVERYONE WHO READS WHETHER OR NOT COMMENTS ARE LEFT. FEEL FREE TO EMAIL ME, IF YOU PREFER. THIS IS NO "BIGGIE" REVELATION. THERE ARE SO MANY OTHER CONDITIONS AND ILLNESSES FAR FAR MORE SERIOUS. IN FACT, THAT IS WHY I NEVER POSTED ABOUT THIS A FEW YRS AGO. MY "STUFF" SEEMS SO TRIVIAL IN COMPARISON; HOWEVER, IT CAN FELL GOOD TO WRITE SOME ABOUT IT HERE. XXOO TO ALL.
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